I Love You, But I Just Can’t Understand You
Jay Thomas
Midland SDA Church
July 13, 2013
INTRODUCTION:
Have you listened to Christians’ talk and discovered what makes them “tick”? What inspires people’s religion?
For some:
hope contained in Bible prophecies
miracle of grace framed by the old rugged cross
faith, like Abraham, in a better world, a city whose builder
Charismatics, hunger for energy in worship - full of power
seek for the quiet beauty of holiness
quest to study deeply the teaching so Jesus
relish exploring for greater knowledge of Bible doctrines
surprising number, simply wish, a church/loving family
be themselves and be accepted just as they are
Because for them, Christianity is wrapped up in one emotion, one virtue, one practice of faith. And that one word is love.
It should bother us, that some Adventists leave/loved. Having defensible doctrinal answers to biblical questions isn’t the main mission of the church, although/important one.
The core mission of the church is to love people the way Jesus loved people, so that the love of God is rightly seen in the hearts of men. Jesus spent the majority of his time instructing his disciples in the radical nature of spiritual leadership based on love rather than fear or coercion.
In the end, all but Judas, bought into the idea, and devoted themselves to the process of winning hearts back to God through self-sacrificing love. John wrote this dynamic principle of conversion in the immortal wards of the Master teacher: John 13:35 "By this all will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another."
The burden of John’s doctrine centered on this insight 1 John 1:3: That which we have seen and heard we declare to you, that you also may have fellowship with us; and truly our fellowship is with the Father and with His Son Jesus Christ. [think about that thought]!
Christians have been given the privilege to share in common the mind and heart that God and Jesus Christ possess. Just as God’s self-sacrificing actions were the outworking of the principle of agape love, so may ours be.
Love’s other-centeredness rebukes the world’s self-absorption. For God so loved . . He gave. When we understanding, we will become far better givers than we are.
TOUGH CHALLENGE
Many months ago, Brandon Lubbert shared a modern day parable story written by Ken Blanchard and Phil Hodges.
The book is called, The Most Loving Place In Town. The book asks the question, “What if the church was known to virtually everyone in the community at large as the most loving place in town?” How would it be different? What impact would this difference have on the success of its mission?
What if we were to thank Jesus for His gift of love that Has saved us, and repent of our slowness in growing into the unselfishness He patterned in the same breath? Would we discover a readiness to learn new lessons in His school of loving?
What if we were to tenderly remember the faith and the devotion of another Christian, Narcissa Whitman, who entered into a life of mission service, not realizing that the very martyrdom she was to experience was wholly preventable? That her testimony in dying, might be the same that we could give today to so many people, “I Love you, but I can’t understand you.” - A classic American tragedy.
Today’s scripture lesson will be illustrated by tough pioneers, facing a tough challenge, finding their mission tough going, mostly because they failed to learn Jesus’s lesson regarding tough loving. In the end, they sought to create a fellowship that they themselves did not possess in the way they assumed they did.
TOUGH PIONEERS
Eight-teen hundred forty-seven, the year our story climaxes, was not so long ago. And just a few years before that, the story began. Narcissa Prentiss was a devout Presbyterian growing up in the early 19th century in upstate New York. At the tender age of 16, she responded to a Christian appeal, and dedicated her life to mission service. In short order, she completed her preparatory course for teaching school, and tried to become a missionary, but the missions board would only consider married women as missionaries. If Narcissa felt undue pressure, she didn’t reveal it. She spurned a would be suitor who ironically would eventually accompany Narcissa on her way west along the newly advertised Oregon Trail.
Only, she would be married to a doctor named Marcus Whitman while the suitor Henry Spalding, would be newly married to his bride, Eliza. And all four of them would be missionaries to the Native Americans.
This “trail” existed mainly in the minds of the scouts at this time. As Narcissa and Eliza met with the hazards of the journey, they were well aware they were the first two white women to cross the Rocky Mountains on the way into the American West.
It seems that Narcissa could make up her mind readily, for she only knew Dr Marcus Whitman a few days before she agreed to marry him in order that the two of them could begin mission service together. They were assigned to the Cayuse Indians living in the Walla Walla Valley of what is now Washington state.
What meaning her life had for her! She was on a mission to save the lost. She would be their teacher, her husband would be their healer. She had her faith, her Bible, and her purpose clear. She was happy, she was confident, even bold. And if you would have asked her, she would have told you she was doing this because she loved Jesus, and she loved the lost. There were many things she couldn’t know, and didn’t know, but she trusted God would provide, and that seemed enough. But tragically, it wasn’t enough.
TOUGH GOING
For awhile, in the early months and years of their mission, she wrote glowing reports in letters back to family in the East. But then a change came about. She didn’t understand the Indians, Even though they told her about themselves, she suspected ulterior motives, and an element of deception. But the raw truth is that the information they gave her, ran against her preferences, and so she argued with the Indians over things she shouldn’t.
When they guided her on how to make a good impression on others in the tribe, she inferred that they were merely greedy by asking for so many gifts. But the Cayuse people spoke a love language of giving to get. To them, if you wanted to create an atmosphere of trust, you invited the stranger into your teepee home to “pow-wow” or hold a discussion. So, when the Indians looked askance (with suspicion, mistrust) at the frame chapel built for religious instruction and for worship, they argued that something so important should be held in her home. However, Narcissa was repulsed by the Cayuse lack of hygiene. No doubt, her revulsion to lice, fleas, and the pungent body odor given off by rancid grease used as insect repellent was well founded in logic, but she failed to understand how her inhospitable behavior signaled rejection to those she was trying to show Christ’s love to.
Rejection and suspicion usually gets met with like behavior, and it is no wonder that the initial openness of the Cayuse to Christianity began to fade into doubts as to its virtues. The feelings between the Whitmans and the Cayuse people grew tense. The missions board, on getting knowledge of this, pulled the plug on the project and ordered a reassignment elsewhere. The experiment had lasted seven years. But by now, Marcus also ran a trading post. White settlers were moving into the area, many of whom Marcus actually had served as a scout to bring them over the Oregon Trail himself. So he journeyed at his expense back East to persuade the board to leave them there. In profound irony, his success with the Mission board signaled his doom at the hands of the Cayuse.
Five years passed. In this time, literally thousands of settlers traveled through the Indian’s hunting lands. Each wave brought increasing displeasure on the part of the Indians. Then, in the year of 1847, there was an outbreak of measles. It was very severe, but even so, few settler children died. But the Cayuse also caught the disease, and when they did, it had a high mortality rate among the adults, while virtually all of their children were affected and died from it. Though Marcus Whitman worked tirelessly for both settlers and Indians, the Indians superstitiously believed this to be a form of conscious treachery on the part of the Whites. Late in November, a group of assassins closed in on the mission compound and massacred the adults, the Whitmans’ older adoptive children, and set fire to the buildings. In a strange twist, the Indians responsible gave themselves up after a 3 year war of skirmishes and retreats. Tiloukaikt and Tomahas surrendered full knowing they would die by hanging. They did it, they said, “Because just as Jesus was willing to die to save His people, they were willing to die to save theirs.”
If only the Whitmans would have shown the Indians loving behaviors that would have signaled that they understood them! When I remember their zeal and their sacrifice, I am filled with sorrow that their love fell short. One of the saddest laments ever heard is the one that goes, “I love you, but I just can’t understand you.”
Narcissa never got that far. In her lack of understanding, she began to blame the Indians for the existing communication problem, when in fact, her own ignorance and limitations to loving sacrifice were the primary reasons love appeared to fail. It was not love that failed, it ultimately was her failure in loving that led her to being hated rather than trusted.
TOUGH LOVING
As much as I would like to distance myself and my church community from her 19th century mission, “People often fail to love” I find that the myopia of Narcissa Whitman is still a spiritual dilemma for members of the Adventist church. Narcissa’s love failed at the point of listening. And because she didn’t listen, she missed understanding what was right in front of her. “And though I give my body to be burned, and have not love, it profits me nothing.”
Jesus’ Instruction in loving is right to this point. In our scripture passage from Luke 6:27-31, He presented a view of loving that challenges us this very day.
A paraphrased 10 commandments of loving: (see Luke 6:27-31)
1 Love your enemies, not just your friends and neighbors
2 Do good to those who hate you.
3 Bless those who curse you.
4 Pray for those who spitefully use you.
5 Turn the other cheek.
6 Yield upon demand, both cloak and tunic
7 Give to all those who ask.
8 Do not ask for your goods to be returned to you.
9 Do unto others as you would have them do to you.
10 Do not love like sinners love, but love like God loves.
AN APPEAL FOR THAT FELLOWSHIP WITH THE MIND OF GOD
The world doesn’t need martyrs nearly so much as it needs a demonstration of such far-reaching and understanding love. Reach up by asking God to add an understanding heart to your heart of love and devotion. Poor Narcissa Whitman broke at least two of these ten commandments of loving. In the end, the Indians had no framework upon which to forgive her short comings. We may rest assured Jesus does and has. When it is your turn to reach out to others, seek first to understand, before you seek to be understood. As you seek to fulfill your mission in serving others, become a better listener, and reach across the barriers that keep people apart and in fear of one another. Let Jesus’ love be seen in your words and actions.
But now it is our turn at mission. When people trust in your love, they will trust in your faith. But first, they need to see a demonstration of the fellowship you have, and I have, with the mind of God. Nothing less will succeed. Love like Jesus loves will win, for that love never fails. Ask HIm for it, today. Then listen to the voices He will send to give you an enlarged understanding. He has destined you to fellowship with God’s mind and heart of love. Choose to become a student of Christ’s love.
And. . . when the student is ready, the Teacher will appear.
SCRIPTURE: Luke 6:27 - 32
Song: 577 In The Heart Of Jesus